From the Satirical newspaper, The Babylon Bee:
HELL—Jeffrey Epstein has been released from hell after coming out as transgender, sources in the afterlife confirmed today.
The millionaire and convicted sex offender donned a blonde wig and told the guardians of hell that he was rehabilitated and ready to go back to the land of the living.
"We no longer consider Epstein a threat -- he is now stunning and brave," said a representative for the place of eternal punishment.
"Hopefully he will be welcomed as the LGBTQ+ hero he now is." Hellish forces also issued an apology to Epstein for treating him poorly.
"We didn't realize he was actually a persecuted member of the marginalized LGBTQ+ community. We hope his story can inspire other criminals and sex offenders to come out."
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