Our Celebrity President

“Mr. President, Line 1, sir”

“Barry O here, Greatest Agent of the Free World. Who’s that on the other end?.”

“Good afternoon, Mr President. It is I, Mahmoud Ahmnidja, amadingali, ahmensta, Achhhmadinjad. President of Iran.”

“MaaaMooo Baby! Bubula! How’s every little thing? What can I do for you today?”

“Mr. President, I wish to inform you we have completed a successful test of a ten kiloton nuclear weapon.”

“Well congratudamnlations, Mamoo baby. Finally bringing your people out of the stone age. That’s fandamntastic. Let me tell you, I know some folks in Hollywood – I can hook you up – that might, just might no promises now, be interested in telling your story.”

“Mr. President I have not called to talk about your Hollywood whores or the Sodom of the Great Satan. I call to tell you we now have the capability to destroy you just like you can destroy us. And unless you surrender to the Peace of Islam in 48 hours we will utterly burn Washington D.C.!”

“Achhhmed, baby, no reason to get up and hard bubula. Why can’t we be friends? You think your part is too small, don’t you? Well, listen, it will take some string pulling and calling in some favors but maybe I can get you listed higher in the credits. How would that be? You know, the higher in the Credits, the better the babes that come aknockin’ to see what you’re really made of if you know what I mean. . .”

“How dare you try to tempt me with painted harlots! You have insulted Allah and his messenger here on Earth. You will pay you Infidel Dog of the Great Satan!”

“Oh I understand, Mamoo. Wouldn’t have it any other way. We’ll pick up the tab for everything. Hmm. . . Infidel Dog of the Great Satan, eh. Say, that’s a pretty good working title. Tell you what, I got Letterman on the other line but I’ll have my people contact your people to get things rolling. Maybe we can do lunch when you come over but don't hold me to that. Stay in touch now, Bubula, alright? Alright. Buh Bye!”

from MSNBC:

'Cordial' meeting for U.S., Iran officials
No 'substantive' talks, but two sides agree to stay in touch, Clinton says

THE HAGUE, Netherlands - In a cautious first step toward unlocking 30 years of tense relations, senior U.S. diplomat Richard Holbrooke had a brief but cordial meeting with Iran's deputy foreign minister Tuesday at an international conference on Afghanistan.

The rare diplomatic approach was the first official face-to-face interplay between the Obama administration and the Iranian regime. U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton cautioned that the brief talks between Holbrooke and Iranian diplomat Mehdi Akhundzadeh were cordial but not "substantive."

"They agreed to stay in touch," Clinton said at the close of a one-day conference on Afghan security and development that was designed partly to allow the diplomatic turn with Iran. She told NBC News, "We think there is room for more engagement with Iran going forward."

the disturbing rest