Thursday, September 26, 2013

Allah's Magical Mountain of Flammable Farts


Pakistan quake island off Gwadar 'emits flammable gas'

Barely half an hour after they were jolted by a major earthquake on Tuesday, people of the Pakistani coastal town of Gwadar had another shock when they saw a new island emerge in the sea, just over a kilometre from the shore. 
A local journalist, Bahram Baloch, received the news via a text message from a friend. "It said a hill has appeared outside my house," Mr Baloch said. 
"I stepped out, and was flabbergasted. I could see this grey, dome-shaped body in the distance, like a giant whale swimming near the surface. Hundreds of people had gathered to watch it in disbelief."
Sounds truly amazing, right?

I'm sure you're wondering to yourself what could such a magical mountain of Allah's majesty look like?

Well, here it is:

Man, It Smells Like Shit Around Here

Frankly, it looks almost like a City Dump.

I guess that's what we ought to have expected.

To the moronic Muslims of Pakistan, this is just fucking unbelievable, transcendental.

But wait, there's more. The Magical Mountain of Allah that did rise out of the sea ... IT FARTS

AND YOU CAN LIGHT IT'S FARTS:
"There were dead fish on the surface. And on one side we could hear the hissing sound of the escaping gas," Mr Baloch said. 
Although they couldn't smell gas, they did put a match to the fissures from where it was oozing, and set it on fire. 
"We put the fire out in the end, but it was quite a hassle. Not even the water could kill it, unless one poured buckets over it."
THE MOUNTAIN OF FLAMMABLE FARTS BURNS WITH A FLAME THAT CAN NOT BE QUENCHED,

UNLESS ALLAH ACCEPTS ONE'S OFFERING OF A BUCKET OF WATER.

Note, the dumbass Muslims don't even try to figure out if they can harness this gas leak and put it to productive use.

Don't tell 'em, but they could probably use it to kill even more Hindus, Christians, and Jews.

Fucking dumbasses.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Al Gore just held a press conference and placed the blame squarely on fracking. Yup, it's our fault.

Unknown said...

It's a methane bumb, wish one of them lights a smoke. :)