Thursday, November 04, 2010

Barrack Obama's Fabulantastic Indian Getaway

Wherein we learn that the President of the United States is afraid of a seaborne assault by monkeys bearing cocnuts to toss at his noggin so they are sending a 34 warship armada, building eighty foot towers and erecting a kilometer long tunnel to keep him from getting beaned by an angry simian.

I'll bet you think I'm kidding.

Maybe he should just stay home and watch TeeVee


34 warships sent from US for Obama visit
Press Trust of India, Updated: November 04, 2010

New Delhi: The White House will, of course, stay in Washington but the heart of the famous building will move to India when President Barack Obama lands in Mumbai on Saturday.

Communications set-up and nuclear button and majority of the White House staff will be in India accompanying the President on this three-day visit that will cover Mumbai and Delhi.

He will also be protected by a fleet of 34 warships, including an aircraft carrier, which will patrol the sea lanes off the Mumbai coast during his two-day stay there beginning Saturday. The measure has been taken as Mumbai attack in 2008 took place from the sea.

Arrangements have been put in place for emergency evacuation, if needed.

Obama is expected to fly by a helicopter -- Marine One -- from the city airport to the Indian Navy's helibase INS Shikra at Colaba in south Mumbai.

Two jets, armed with advanced communication and security systems, and a fleet of over 40 cars will be part of Obama's convoy.

Around 800 rooms have been booked for the President and his entourage in Taj Hotel and Hyatt.

The President will have a security ring of American elite Secret Service, which are tasked to guard the President, along with National Security Guards (NSG) and personnel from central paramilitary forces and local police in Mumbai and Delhi.

Similar arrangements will be in place in Delhi, with the Air Force One to be kept in all readiness throughout Obama's stay here from Sunday afternoon to Tuesday morning.

Maurya Hotel, where the President will stay, has already been swarmed by American security personnel and protective measures have been put in place.

Security drills have already been carried out at the hotel as well as Rajghat, where he will visit.

Sources said 13 heavy-lift aircraft with high-tech equipment, three helicopters and 500 US security personnel have arrived in India ahead of Obama's visit.

The US security has also brought interception and obstruction device, sniffer dogs, rescue gadgets.

Apart from Obama's Air Force One, a few private luxury jets carrying top American corporate leaders, who are part of Obama's entourage, are also expected to arrive in India in the next 2-3 days.

All high-rise buildings in the vicinity of Mumbai's Taj Mahal hotel and Delhi's Maurya Sheraton hotel, where the US President will stay, are being sanitised and security personnel will be positioned on rooftops to prevent any air-borne attack.

The Ridge area - opposite Delhi's Maurya Sheraton hotel - has been illuminated by floodlights as part of the heightened security drill.

The Home Ministry has already issued an alert for Mumbai and Delhi asking authorities to take extra precautions during Obama's visit as well as on Diwali on Friday.

Times of India

Monkeys to be kept at bay during Obama's visit
IANS, Nov 4, 2010, 04.06am IST

NEW DELHI: Eighty-foot-high towers being built around the ridge area in the capital are not just being erected for the security of US President Barack Obama but also to keep the monkeys in the vicinity at bay, police said.

Obama will be visiting the national capital on November 8-9 and will be staying at ITC Maurya hotel, situated near the ridge area where the monkey population is high.

"As several incidents of monkey-menace have been reported from the area, we are keeping a watch on the simians," a police officer said.

He also said that trained monkey-catchers will also be deployed.


Coconuts removed from trees in preparation for Barack Obama's India trip
India is preparing for Barack Obama's first visit to the country by removing coconuts from palm trees in Mumbai to protect the US president.

Mr Obama will arrive in India on Saturday for the first leg of an Asian tour.

But as well as the usual security measures that come with welcoming a a visiting dignitary, Indian authorities have decided to go one step further, by removing all natural threats to the president as well.

All coconuts around the city's Gandhi museum, one of Mr Obama's stops in the city, are being taken down.

Mani Bhavan, where Mahatma Gandhi stayed during his freedom struggle against the British, is among five places the US president is visiting in Mumbai.

"We told the authorities to remove the dry coconuts from trees near the building. Why take a chance?" Mani Bhavan's executive secretary, Meghshyam Ajgaonkar, told the BBC.

Last week American security officers inspected Mani Bhavan and its surroundings along with other places the president is likely to visit.

Every year in India people are injured or even killed by falling coconuts.

Mr Obama, still smarting from heavy losses in the midterm elections, will visit India, Indonesia, South Korea, Japan and China on the 10-day tour.

DNA India

Tunnel for Obama near Mani Bhavan
Published: Thursday, Nov 4, 2010

It could give a sense of superior American organisation, or be an indicator of a deep-set persecution complex. It could also be a manifestation of Uncle Sam’s penchant for a show of strength.

The matter pertains to US president Barack Obama’s planned visit to Mani Bhavan —the Gandhi museum — on November 6, soon after he reaches Mumbai. On Monday, US secret agents visited the museum to plan Obama’s security detail.

They were accompanied by officers of Mumbai Police and civic officials of the D ward (where Mani Bhavan is located). While inspecting the route and the buildings lining up the route to the museum, the Americans detected a skyscraper near Peddar road and also found the area to be highly populated.

Since it is difficult to monitor such a congested area, they came up with a quick solution which left the Indians accompanying them amazed: A bomb-proof over-ground tunnel — to be installed by US military engineers in just an hour.

The tunnel would be a kilometre long and measure 12ft by 12ft — enough to let Obama’s cavalcade pass through. The tunnel would be centrally air-conditioned, fitted with close-circuit television cameras, and will be heavily guarded at every point, including, of course, its entry and exit.

Details about when exactly the tunnel would be made were not forthcoming. But officials said that the structure would be dismantled immediately after Obama leaves the area.


christian soldier said...

and the per day accounting of the expenses from our tax $$$ is $200,000,000 that's 200 MILLION per day! and here I thought it was only $20,000,000-geeeeeese - I just don't have the BIG PICTURE of extravagant spending-and entitlement like bho and his minions...

revereridesagain said...

Watch out for Flying Monkees, Obummah. That Witch is still pissed about the House and her sister.

Anonymous said...

$2,000,000,000 for ten days. This is one area the House of Representatives can apply the brakes. It's as though he's trying to personally bankrupt the country.

Epaminondas said...

I feel so much better now knowing that Obama has with him a fleet the size of the the one which invaded Saipan.

Just in case,,,, I mean maybe we want Goa or something

Always On Watch said...

Judas Priest!

midnight rider said...

At a White House Press Briefing Wednesday Robert Gibbs denied rumors that Congressman Barney Frank would also be on this trip. "It is untrue that Mr Frank will be attending as the 'Official Monkey Spanker'. Though we feel he is uniquely qualified, to the best of our knowledge Mrs. Obama herself will reprimand any primates that try to grab The President's coconuts."

Always On Watch said...

Maybe it's some kind of Sindbad voyage.

Epaminondas said...

They are really going batshit denying the $200 million a day thing.


oh but I forget's all about his royal rahjah fucking highness and his plenipotentiary wonderful entourageness of fleets and and cars and advance military security building tunnels on the fly so he an visit museums 9000 miles from his prime responsibilities

Pastorius said...

Maybe he intends on invading Indian, and taking them out, for his friends in Pakistan.

Alexander Münch said...


Mohandas Gandhi, the Mahatma, “the Great Soul”, was never awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. This has been a perennial source of unhappiness for those Indians inclined to view Gandhi as by far the most deserving candidate of the twentieth century, and the hand of Britain, and the imperial West more generally, is seen as having been instrumental in depriving Gandhi of this “great honor”. Many Nobel Laureates in Peace are themselves agreed that Gandhi should have been honored before they were honored.

Obama's trip to India isn't just a 10-days “roots searching” expedition that includes Indonesia in Southeast Asia where Obama learned the Krayon!...
As an Infidel, I see the wider picture ! It is the strange and mysterious way used by the "Holly Providence" to do finally justice with the Mahatma and bring him the Nobel Medal ! If the "Flotilla" is necessary to guard it from the pirates, I would add the whole sixth fleet and all the US nuke submarines to it !!!