Tuesday, May 10, 2022

TAKING IT BACK! Groomers Now Defiantly "Reclaiming" The Word "Groomer"

The hurling of the term "groomer" got me thinking. The word has been used for a few decades to refer to the process of acclimating children to sexual abuse, and the uber-right drinkers of Florida Gov. Desantis' presidential-campaign-flavored Kool-Aid have echo-chambered his speech writer's appropriation of the term to refer to anyone who supports LGBTQIA+ rights. But the word has plenty of good, useful, healthy meaning, and I'm going to step up and take it back. 
We all groom kids. Anyone who has a beloved child in their life is a groomer. Everything we do has the power to influence young people and instruct them on what it means to be human. 
The following evening there was an award banquet at her school, which we were invited to attend. One of her friends is transfeminine with only partial support from her family. The girl wasn't able to express her gender authentically at the event, and our grandchild recognized her discomfort. She took several friends to the girl's table and sat with her for the remainder of the evening, so she wouldn't feel as alone, uncomfortable, and unrecognized. 
Our grandchild is an awesome person, and would be without our brazenly queer presence in her life. But if there's a chance that our love and advocacy has played a tiny role in her freedom to be herself, and her deep compassion and solidarity for those who struggle to be themselves, then we are proud, and honored. Yes, I'm a groomer. At least, I strive to be.

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