Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Pennsylvania Tourism Board's Adversitizement

Cross-Posted at Tasty Infidelicacies

Hideously Catching Viral Video from my adopted home state. Pass it on like a bad cold....and don't blame me either, Mark. 

Somewhere in our state is a culture that can be defined as something other than beer drinking hick-sensabilly, but I don't live in that quadrant of the keystone state. Technically, we're a Blue State, but here's the reality:
You don't need me to circle Pennsylvania, do you? Good.

Of course, that was back in 2004. You see what a stable looking place we once lived in. Most of the Urban Insane Asylums were far removed from me.  Ah, good times...I guess. Then something happened in 2008. An irrational exuberance, perhaps, and behold the electoral map of the Kul't  Lichnosti, Sovietese for The Cult of Personality.  Not a pretty sight.

There is hope that we can recombobulate ourselves and get things fixed, but with the government growing itself as big as it has in just the last18 months or so, longer, if you include the last few dying days of Prez George II, it might be a good investment to stock up on a lot of beer. And something other than Yuengling.


midnight rider said...

And what, exactly, is wrong with Yuengling?

And is there really anything wrong or untruthful in that video?

Ya dang transplant you :)

(ya know, if you look at that second map at the right angle in a Rorschach kinda way, it looks like an Eagle takin' a nice long toke)

Jewel said...

Not being a native, and absolutely loving the guys in the video, by the by, but not necessarily the songwhichIcan'tgetoutofmyhead...I prefer Corona beer.....with lime.
Sorry, that's just how it is.

midnight rider said...

Actually my favorite is Guinness followed by St Pauli Girl Dark, Sam Adams, Heineken.

After 30 years of Yuengling it has become like drinking water (which is what it is around these parts). Ya want something with more pizzazz.

I agree, too. On days like we've been having there's nothing like Corona and lime.

As for songs you can't get out often your head mine is frequently Mama Tried.

Can't figure that one out. . .

Mother Effingby said...

Thank you for not wanting to slit my Corona guzzling throat, mate. I love Guinness, daughter introduced it to me, and Sam Adams I have heard is also a good brew. I don't drink beer hardly ever, but this summer has really tried my resistance.

Pastorius said...

Could you guys send me some Little Debbie's and some Lebanon Bologna?


Mother Effingby said...

INFIDEL! We don't eat little Debbies! We eat Tasty Kakes. You blaspheme our highly processed white flour and sugar products of coronary death and deliciousness. I'd be happy to send you some sweet balogna and TASTY KAKES....butterscotch krimpets okay with ya?

Mother Effingby said...

And there's a difference between sweet baloney and Lebanon baloney...I could send you both to sample and find out for yourself, if'n ya'd like.

midnight rider said...

Pastorius -- trust me on this -- the sweet baloney is better. Make it on pumpernickel. Butter, cheese of your choice. Mustard. Then add salted peanuts on it.

Doesn't sound too good until you've tried it.

My brother in law from Australia was up a few years ago and tried one and was instantly hooked.

of course getting sweet baloney to him in Victoria is a bit of a problem. . .

Although you can't go wrong with the Lebanon baloney either.

midnight rider said...

By the way, aother name for them is railroad turkey. I've never ben able to find out why.

midnight rider said...

Of course another awesomely delicious and cardio killing way to eat them is to take your choice of sweet or Lebanon and schmear cream cheese on it then either eat it as a roll up or put it on a sandwich.

midnight rider said...

Wash it all down with Yuengling of course.

midnight rider said...

Yuengling's Lord Chesterfield Ale to be precise.

midnight rider said...

By the way -- the difference is Sweet baloney is the same as Lebanon baloney but has brown sugar added to it. Both are a type of summer sausage or, as referred to locally, Food of the Gods.

IF we feel like sharing with them.

Ok, I'm done.

I think. . .

midnight rider said...

One more thing. . .

It's Amish, with a short A, not a long A.

Fucking tourists.

Always stopping to look at the goddamn cows.

You know you're in for a long ride when you're on Route 340 (Old Philadelphia Pike) and get behind some idiot who slows down at every friggin' barnyard and farm and points out the livestock to his kids.

And it's ALL farms until you get to Intercourse.

At least the Amish (short A) have the decency to move their buggies to the shoulder of the road and let speedier traffic pass.

NOTE TO ALL YOU VISITORS -- when passing a horse and buggy do so gently without cutting in too quickly and spooking the horse. I've seen some unpleasant things happen that way that could have ended badly.

midnight rider said...

"Oh look sweetie! There's a real live mule!" (what, instead of a real dead mule???) "And look, there's a man in a funny hat and beard with a plow following behind him. That's how they used to plow in olden times."

Man I hate that Olden Times phrase. Looks to me like that's how they're fucking plowing NOW in newen times.


Mother Effingby said...

Nah, friend, we got Amish all the way north of 340 along 741 and Graystone Road, which is behind my house. And all the way into Landisville, too, along 722...or is it 772? Ah hell, you got them there too. Patience is an idling van, MR.

Sweet Baloney Doobies: 2 tablespoons of butter mixed with softened cream cheese or better yet: PINEAPPLE cream cheese, rolled up. mmmmmm. So delightfully good...and yes, it's addicting. Do you like shoofly pie?

midnight rider said...

omigod Shoofly Pie! I can't pass one without stopping. Got one in the fridge right now.

There is no better dessert.

(I referenced 340 because my knife dealer is on 340 and I'm very familair with that trek). We have them here, too, way the hell up to Kutztown.

Pastorius said...


I meant to write Tasty Kakes.

I didn't mean Little Debbie's. Sorry about that.

midnight rider said...

Dude, ya just don't mess with a Dutchman and his fodd.

There's places out there beyond them cornfields. . .

Clop clop clop clop clop


Leave da gun. Bring Da Shoo Fly Pie.

Clop clop clop clop clop

Jewel said...

Mister MR defends ma honner, and my tasty cakes! Boo Yeah!