Marines ban farting to avoid offending Muslims
There are so many weird aspects of this story. Don't these Marines have mothers, or someone in their lives who told them as children that audible passing of gas was offensive? And the high command has to tell them to cut it out because it offends Afghans, as if such a reaction were different from that of any normal person? And unfortunately, the friendly-fire jihad attacks by Afghans that regularly punctuate the working relationship between U.S. and Afghan troops are not going to be ended by this small gesture in "trust building." "For Marines in Afghanistan: be careful where you fart," by Gina Cavallaro in Military Times, August 23 (thanks to David):
Marine Corps Times is a family newspaper and we only rarely have offensive
language in our stories.
But this week the word “fart” appears in a story I wrote about the
importance of trust between Marines and the Afghan national army soldiers they
work with.
I didn’t want to write this little blog entry about farts.
It’s not even on my beat. But my colleague Dan Lamothe, whose byline you have
seen here quite often, shamed me into it.
“You owe it to all Marines,”
he told me.
So here’s the news: audible farting has been banned for some
Marines downrange because it offends the Afghans.
I know there are many
things in the Afghan culture that don’t seem normal to Americans and it’s hard
to spend seven months working in someone else’s back yard. Still, the Marines I
saw downrange are doing a pretty good job at trying to do the right thing around
the Afghans.
They’re not supposed to cuss because it could be
misunderstood (that one goes out the window a lot). And they stay away from
talking about politics, religion or girls because those topics could escalate
into major disagreements (they can’t communicate anyway because of the language
barrier).
But farting? That’s practically a sport. Ok, it’s not soccer,
but a good contest could open the door for cross-cultural exchanges, jokes and
other gallows humor....
14 comments:
Does this mean that Bacon&Eggs with beans is of the menu?
Midnight Rider,
How can they ban bodily functions?
Muslims won't be happy until they ban our breathing!
This shit (pun intended) goes back to Moe the pedophile profit.
One's prayers are annulled by this activity which seems to have annoyed that perfect man (gag).
CJK,
Well, it smells awful, and I would recommend trying to avoid doing it around other people, but seriously the idea that God would ignore our prayers because someone happened to pass gas nearby, especially if he couldn't help it is absurd.
Damien: The last part of your comment pretty well sums up the spiritual depth of Mohammedanism.
No more FARTING ?
What a FARTWA ! Ha!
PrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrPooooooooooooF !
You know, Muslims are not so much offended by farting as they are concerned that it will break their ritual cleansing process (Wudhu) before prayer.
This ruling shows the ignorance of the military. Muslims, like everyone else, fart. And, I'm guessing they probably even think it is funny.
But whatever. In typical American fashion the military has gone for a zero tolerance where simple common sense would have sufficed.
Additionally, we have once again demonstrated that we are completely pathetic dhimmis.
This is a funny story, but it is also completely disgusting.
Once again, our Founders had the answer. . .
"Permit me then humbly to propose one of that sort for your consideration, and through you, if you approve it, for the serious Enquiry of learned Physicians, Chemists, &c. of this enlightened Age. It is universally well known, That in digesting our common Food, there is created or produced in the Bowels of human Creatures, a great Quantity of Wind.
That the permitting this Air to escape and mix with the Atmosphere, is usually offensive to the Company, from the fetid Smell that accompanies it.
That all well-bred People therefore, to avoid giving such Offence, forcibly restrain the Efforts of Nature to discharge that Wind.
That so retain’d contrary to Nature, it not only gives frequently great present Pain, but occasions future Diseases, such as habitual Cholics, Ruptures, Tympanies, &c. often destructive of the Constitution, & sometimes of Life itself.
Were it not for the odiously offensive Smell accompanying such Escapes, polite People would probably be under no more Restraint in discharging such Wind in Company, than they are in spitting, or in blowing their Noses.
My Prize Question therefore should be, To discover some Drug wholesome & not disagreable, to be mix’d with our common Food, or Sauces, that shall render the natural Discharges of Wind from our Bodies, not only inoffensive, but agreable as Perfumes."
-- To The Royal Acadamy Of Farting
Benjamin Franklin c. 1781
Then let the Marines conduct drills as to how to pass SBD's.
Or, as my kid calls them; Silent But Violent.
To Muslims - To quote the French in Monty Python and the Holy Grail - "I fart in your general direction."
"And, I'm guessing they probably even think it is funny."
..............................
"An Islamic regime must be serious in every field," explained Ayatollah Khomeini. "There are no jokes in Islam. There is no humour in Islam. There is no fun in Islam."
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