Saturday, January 30, 2010

Coming soon - Infidel Air!

Fly the Friendly Skies
Detailed passenger history database, free ham sandwiches prior to boarding, holy crayon pattern carpeting, hot flight attendants with less clothing on, choice of Team America, United Flight 93, or 300 The Movie in-flight entertainment, onboard bomb and fear sniffing dogs, armored cockpit doors, armed flight crew with extensive background checks, porcine plasma paintball style weaponry (for passengers who just want to plonk someone for fun), video cameras in the lavatory, titanium electroshock collars - (if four passengers feel you deserve 50,000 volts of behavior modification they simply key in your collar ID simultaneously), ground based missile countermeasures.

Make it fun and safe and people will pay more for the ride. Infidel Air - Safer than standing on the ground.


Anonymous said...

Miller, Dingell ask account of airport safety lapses

WASHINGTON – Some members of Michigan’s congressional delegation want to know whether there’s a lack of uniform standards for airline and airport personnel reacting to bomb threats and, if so, whether that led to people being put at risk at Detroit Metro Airport after Flight 253 landed on Dec. 25.One House member, U.S. Rep. Mark Schauer, plans to bring it up at a hearing next Thursday of the Aviation Subcommittee he serves on. The Battle Creek Democrat has been pushing for the panel – part of the House Transportation and Infrastructure Committee – to look into the Christmas Day bombing attempt and any glitches which may have endangered the public.

In an exclusive today, the Free Press reported that miscues and apparent blunders may have put passengers and people on the ground in potential danger after an incident in which authorities say Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab tried to blow up the Northwest flight on Christmas Day as it descended into the airport.

“It appears that there were some breaches of protocol, some lapses in the process,” said Schauer. “We need to examine those and learn from those.” He said he forwarded the Free Press article to U.S. Rep. Jerry Costello, the Illinois Democrat who chairs the Aviation Subcommittee, in the hopes that questions about airline and airport protocol can be raised at Thursday’s already planned hearing on airline safety and pilot training.

read the rest at the link

Autumn_Auburn said...

I'd pay $1000 an hour for a seat on that plane!